The phone rang last night during dinner so Clarrie Junior kindly offered to answer it.
"Hey Dad, there's a bloke here wanting to ask questions about the election on Saturday. Do you want to speak with him?"
"Yep, sure do," I responded.
Although I missed the caller's preamble I had a fair idea what to expect, given it was about the fifth survey that had come my way since the former, and disgraced, local MP Steve Cansdell sh*t in the proverbial nest and then jumped ship after serving just 6 months of the four-year parliamentary term. Please, remind me again how much this by-election is costing you and me and how much the former local MP is contributing to it from his handsome parliamentary pension. Hey, he caused it so he should be forking out for it.
Question 1: "Which party will you give your first preference to on Saturday?"
I thought, "That's an easy one to answer but I wished they asked me why would I not vote for candidate so-and-so".
Question 2 went a bit like this: "We want to know what you think about some identities who are associated with politics in your area. Press 1 for favourable, 2 for neutral, 3 for unfavourable or 4 for if you don't know them."
First name, Steve Cansdell. There's no prize for guessing how this voter, along with most of the electorate, feel about being p*ssed on from a great height by someone who told big fibs in a sworn statement and then tried to downplay the seriousness of his actions.
Second name, Chris Gulaptis. Again, there's no prize for readers on this one.
But then, the real shocker! The phone went dead! No more names! No more questions! I was left standing there with the phone like a shag on a rock. What an anti-climax! Not a thank-you, kiss my b*m or anything else. C'mon, that's not fair and square. Imagine the uproar if the final siren was sounded ten minutes early in the AFL grand final or the winner of the Melbourne Cup was the nag that was in front at the furlong pole.
Boy oh boy, that was such a disappointment. I had been looking forward to giving Fred Nile's disciple a very special rating. After all, she went out on a limb to reveal how out of touch with reality she is when she made a cameo appearance in the scandalous Stuart Ramsey - Grafton abattoir affair.
Admittedly, I would have had to give most of the other candidates, with the exception of The Greens and Country Labor candidates, ratings of "4". Well, they are apart from Wade Walker pretty much blow-ins and/or serial election offenders (one in particular has almost had as many starts as Phar Lap).
As for Wade Walker, one of my mates at our local watering hole pretty much summed him up when he said, "Walker had a bit of a go and kept the goat track (aka Pacific Highway) up there as an issue but other than that his effort was rather pedestrian." (That mate's a punny fella.)